Lord I Was Born A Ramblin' Man . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Wednesday, December 4, 2002 --  tork

Hot dammit - you know when you finally get settled in, nice and comfortable on the toilet, you've just taken one of those cleansing shits, a liquid catharsis of the soul and guts via the burning brown ring of fire, walking the fine line between hurting and feeling good, but yet leaving you with a nice after glow of the void which just naturally lends itself to rubbing one out? What happens, invariably, is that just as you're preparing to get on with the good stuff after a world of shit, the phone rings, or someone knocks at the door to sell you fucking girl scout cookies, and as you open the door with your pants hastily pulled up, awkwardly draping your cack which feels like a hot steel pipe pressed against your leg and bulging ominously, a trace of jiz threatening to wick it way to the front of the material, I you stop and wonder, "WTF?"

Seriously, why the fuck do we break it off like that to answer the fucking phone, get the door or whatever trivial incessiance demands our immediate attention? Who's it possibly going to be, anyhow? I mean, I'd be pissed if even if it were The Pope or The President was on my doorstep when I'm like that - I'd probably get gang tackled and cavity searched for having some kind of weapon on me from the lump in my pants - welcome to my life. But anyway, you know what I'm talking about and no I didn't buy any fucking girl scout cookies - I doubt that particular den mom won't be a problem in the future judging from the way she beat feet when I opened the door, breathing hard from racing down the hall, and looking like some kind of pervert - which I'm not, aholes.

ANYHOW, moving on, that's exactly what it's like now in EQ with me - I have this Big Important Thing to do RL, but it means I'm missing my guild just ripping the shit out of PoP, and I'm sure a few of the stalkers are going into convulsions right now keeping all that hate, bile and ichor pent up without me to spew it upon (/huggles, I love you guys, too). I think the Evil Empire Dead God Count (eeDGC™, an on-line measure of relative leetness corresponding directly to RL penis size, for true) was like 7 now, and God knows how many flags I'm SOL on - oh well, those are the breaks.

I'll be back in a week or so, but since I can't really post screenshots†, loot, stalkers/quotes or anything really, you guys will get treated to some random ramblings from me, dumb luck and I, we've had a lot of adventures together. I'll squeeze out something soon when I get the chance and a link to post it.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna to burp the worm - hold my calls.

†(unless asshole of guild posts them to the message board, wink wink nudge nudge jpg png 50k-ish don'tsuxgetultravisionincreasebrightnesslevelsaddsomecontrastplskthx)